Category Archive: Personal Leadership

The Role Of Contentment In Simple Living

Posted by on July 30, 2009

We are reminded in scripture that we brought nothing into this world and it is certain that we can take nothing out when we leave therefore having food and clothing we should be content. This does not mean we should all take a vow of poverty and live in a monastery.

We have all been given gifts and talents and we should with passion and excellence use them to the best of our ability to impact the world for good. The point is that regardless of wealth or poverty we should learn to lead a life that is not driven by things that don’t really matter.

In Richard Swenson great book on Margin he list several characteristics of simple living that are helpful:

1. Voluntary—If the simple life is forced, it ceases to be simple. This is a choice based on core values not something that is demanded.

2. Free—One of the key features of simplicity and at the same time, one of its principal advantages is that it is a life of freedom. It is being controlled by that which is life-giving and refusing to be controlled by that which is destructive.

3. Uncluttered—Emotionally we release our worries, we reconcile our relationships, we forgive our enemies and we begin anew each day.

4. Creative—Life is not boring just because it is simple. Simplicity sets the imagination free to work and to enjoy.

5. Authentic—A simple lifestyle must distinguish between the spiritually authentic and spiritually inauthentic. Biblical authenticity includes those things God has told us to focus on, those things that have eternal, God-assigned value: people, love, service, worship, prayer, self-denial, relationships, contentment, freedom, and rest.

6. Disciplined—Restraint is necessary for successful living, and all the more for simple living. Comfort is not a legitimate primary goal—authenticity is.

All Christians have made peace with God through their faith in Jesus Christ but all Christians do not live on a daily basis with the peace of God. This kind of peace only comes as the fruit of a contented life.

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Promises We Make

Posted by on July 24, 2009

This is the seventh in a series of ten posts on promises we should be willing to make to the people that matter the most in our lives.  A promise goes beyond a mere commitment to do something it carries the clear expectation that we are going to pay the price to do what we said we would do.

The first promise was I will sincerely listen to what you have to say.  Really listening to someone without a personal agenda communicates to them that they have value in your life and that you sincerely care.

The second promise was I will always tell you the truth.  Without this there can be no basis of trust, just ask Elizabeth Edwards how painful that can be.

The third promise is I will apologize when I am wrong.  When someone sincerely and genuinely apologizes we know two things.  They are willing to humble themselves and they want to restore their relationship with us because we still matter to them.

The forth promise is I will forgive you when you hurt me.  There can be no lasting peace in any relationship without the power of forgiveness.  This is even more critical when someone has come to us and sincerely apologized they are asking without saying it will you please forgive me.

The fifth promise is I will live with hope and believe the best.  Relationships are messy and there are always going to be times when people do or say things that upset us.  It is at that precise moment that we have a critical choice to make about how we process what we are hearing.  The bottom line is we will either choose to believe the best about the other person or we will assume the worst. 

The sixth promise is I will not manipulate change in you.  This deals with our core motivation when we interact with other people.  If our goal in sharing with this person is to only tell them what they are doing wrong and why they should be the one to change then we are manipulating. 

The seventh promise is I will always love you no matter what.  This lets the other person know that our love for them is not based on what they do or how they act but who they are as a person.

It in the truest sense it is unconditional love based on grace given and not performance earned.  This gives people the freedom to fail in their relationship with us without the fear of total rejection on our part because of some mistake they have made.

It is impossible to love someone in this way unless you have first received this kind of love yourself.  Once you have experience God’s love you have the capacity to pass it own to others.  You cannot give to someone else what you have not first received yourself.

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Priority Of Personal Development

Posted by on July 22, 2009

I was attending a conference many years ago and heard for the first time this life changing quote, “You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.”  I made a commitment on that day to apply this principle in my life.

The people you meet part of this development applies to all of life.  There is great wisdom in finding people who know more than you do about your area of expertise or interest and asking them for a meeting so that you can learn all that you can from someone who has already been where you want to go.  Every year you should have a list of at least ten new individuals that are successful and willing to invest in your life.

Please do not limit this to your professional life because you can find people everywhere who are great spouses or parents or involved in church and community work.  Some of the greatest connections I have ever made were in the normal flow of life because I was always looking for someone who could teach me something.

In the area of reading I have found that for every ten books that I read on a particular subject I will find at least one that will permanently change my life for good.  These become the books that you read at least once a year just to remind yourself of all the truths that you need to make sure you are applying in your life.

One of the disciplines I have developed over the years is that I will write the power statements or great quotes on the inside flyleaf of every good book so that I can always go back for a quick review.  If you will set a goal of at least one new book a month to start you will be amazed by how much your life will change because as you read your capacity to understand and develop new skills will be exponentially multiplied.

I am sure if this quote were made today it would include some reference to the incredible amount of information on the web.  Today you can read blogs and watch videos by some of the greatest communicators on life’s most challenging subjects whenever you want and usually without any cost but your time.

All learning that enhances personal development is an investment in your future that will give you an incredible return on your investment.

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Follow Up Or Fail

Posted by on July 21, 2009

I cannot tell you how many people I have worked with over the years that are great at getting something started but totally ineffective in finishing the task with excellence.  They get very excited in the creative planning stages of something but when it gets down to execution they lose interest and allow performance to deteriorate.

Keith Ferrazzi in his great book Never Eat Alone says that good follow up alone elevates you above 95% of your peers in every area of your life.  In his opinion it is the absolute key to success in any field.

In the area of networking he makes sure that he makes contact with any new person he meets within twelve to twenty-four hours after they have initially met.  He says why go to all the trouble of meeting new people if you’re not going to work on making them a part of your life?

This same discipline applies to phone conversations and meetings where commitments have been make for some future action.  It is extremely important to get all assignments down in writing and distribution made for all involved giving what is expected, who is responsible and when the project should be completed.

Many times great decisions have been made only to see the idea or project fail not because of poor initial planning but simply not paying attention to all the details involved in implementation.  Creativity alone can produce a lot of excitement but follow up alone is what produces sustainable excellence.

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The Nostalgia Of The Past

Posted by on July 20, 2009

Most of us are over scheduled and have way too much stress in our lives.  As a reaction to the pressure of the present we often find ourselves looking back and longing for a time when life was simpler and slower than it is today.

What we selectively seem to forget is that the past had its own set of problems and even though things may have been slower that does not mean they were better.  When we live in the past we also are blinded to the blessings of the present and are not able to enjoy what we have that is good in our lives.

In Richard Swenson’s book entitled Margin he deals with this romantic mentality of turning back the clock to a better time.  He writes, “The analogy of a clock is not helpful.  It is not the question of a clock, but a compass.  The issue is not chronology, but direction.”

It is impossible to create more time in any given day.  With that reality clearly in mind then we are only left with two options.  We must know what is important each and every day and make sure those are the things that get done.

What is not so clear is that this does not mean adding these important things to an already full calendar.  The ability to know what to say no to on a moment by moment basis is the only way we will have the emotional, spiritual and physical margin we need to live today without regrets.

Clocks can only tell you what time it is while your personal compass can tell you what to do with your time.  Big Difference!!!!!!!

 

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Credibility The Foundation For Leadership

Posted by on July 17, 2009

There are many leadership qualities that must be present in the leader if people are going to trust them to the point of following.  It is very important to be committed, competent and inspiring but without credibility especially today people will see you as a fake and be totally turned off.

The bottom line is regardless of how visionary the message if they cannot believe in the messenger then trust is destroyed.  People may show up for work but their heart is not in it and although they seem positive in front of superiors they are constantly critical with their peers in private.

If leaders are to maintain credibility they have to walk the talk and personally practice what they preach.  When their actions are inconsistent with their words and they do not follow through on their promises then they are no longer seen as authentic.

When team members work on a project for a long time and produce great results only to see the leader take an inappropriate amount of the credit they feel burned.  They want to see leaders who give credit to others and assume personal responsibility when they make mistakes.

If the leader is seen as real when things are not going well people will give them the benefit of the doubt every time.  When leaders are hypocritical and things are even going well they will get polite support but in reality they have lost the confidence of their team and sadly don’t even know it.

 

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Lighting Own Fire

Posted by on July 16, 2009

We all understand that light is used in the Bible as a picture of truth, wisdom and understanding.  It is important to daily walk in the light and not in the darkness which represents confusion, deception and lies.

Many times in our life we find ourselves in a position of asking God for specific light or guidance in a major life decision.  We sincerely want His will and we completely trust His plans for our life.  The hard part is when the light does not come and we find ourselves sitting in the darkness of not knowing what to do.

The great danger in waiting on God is that many times we will try to light our own fire because we so desperately want to move forward.  We can justify this because the path we have chosen to walk is a good one and surely this is something God will bless.  When we do this the scripture says that eventually all our manmade fires will go out and we will be in a far darker place than where we began.

The darkness that comes from lighting our own fire is the result of not being patient and trusting God’s perfect timing.  The end result is feeling alone with fear and doubt as your constant companions.

The darkness that comes from waiting on God is the result of His wanting to reveal things to you about yourself that can only be found in a dark place.  Even though the future may not be clear the present is because you are finally aware that He was with you in the darkness all along. 

Waiting with Him is always better than walking ahead without Him.

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Adding Too Much Value

Posted by on July 15, 2009

Every day we have conversations with people who are trying to tell us something we already know.  Most of the time we interrupt them in mid sentence and complete their thought so we can move on to something else that we think is more important.

There are sometimes when this is very appropriate especially where timing is extremely important and we must make decisions quickly.  However the vast majority of times our stopping them is totally inappropriate for a variety of reasons.

First of all we really do not know for sure all that they were going to say and many times they do know something we need to hear but we are too impatient to wait and listen.  We have this need to impress people with our knowledge and experience to the point we come across as rude and insensitive.

In a business environment we feel justified in cutting to the bottom line for productivity sake but we fail as leaders to see the value in allowing other people to participate in the process.  If you only see your team as a means to your predetermined end then in reality they are only attending this meeting for their information and not for their involvement.

The willingness to listen to someone regardless of the value of the information communicated is an investment in them as a person.  The agenda is no longer what can they do for me but how can I help them. 

There is a time to add value and genuinely help someone by what you know but only after they have had their opportunity to shape the conversation first.  Nobody likes someone who always thinks they know it all.  Let’s be sure we are not that someone.

 

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Moving Beyond Significance

Posted by on July 14, 2009

We owe a great deal to several authors who have written excellent books on how to move from success as the primary goal in your life to real significance. Probably the book Half Time by Bob Buford has made the most life changing impact with people who have worked very hard to be professionally successful in the corporate world only to find their personal life lacked real purpose and meaning.

Significance moves way beyond profits as a definition of success to people and how is my life adding value to others. Success many times is simply about what do we get at the end of the day while significance is about what are we willing to give away to make a difference.

If you want to have an eternal impact on the people who are a part of your life you must move beyond significance to surrender. When you live a total life of surrender your definition of success is totally determined by the One you are following. This definition alone will give you true significance as He uses your life story to impact other people in ways that will permanently change them for their good.

This means that we must die to the world’s definitions of success as the accumulation of power, position and pleasure and conform our expectations to His perfect will for our lives. This may include the ability to make a lot of money and have great positions of leadership responsibility. It may also mean a life that is filled with suffering and difficulty that can be leveraged by God to even have a greater impact on other people as they see you daily walk in grace and peace.

A surrendered life is one that is lived in total partnership with God so that He can use us as He sees best to change the world one person at a time starting with us. There can be no greater definition of success and significance in this life.

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Performance Review Systems

Posted by on July 13, 2009

All of us at some point in time have waited with anxiety for that wonderful time of the year when we receive our annual performance review.  Even if you know that you have had a great year you are never really sure what is going to be said and how pleased management is with your performance.

To a great degree this whole process is a major problem within most organizations.  On the one hand poor performers are not dealt with on an ongoing basis and sometimes they are even given good reviews because their direct supervisor does not want to admit that they also have failed.  Sometimes employees think things are going great only to have the big bomb dropped with no real explanation as to why they were not told before.

On the other extreme top performers are left in the dark about what they are doing well and they only get the one time a year serious conversation about where they stand and what is next in the area of development.  The bottom line there should be ongoing informal times for evaluation and at least twice a year if not quarterly a brief review of exactly where everyone stands in regards to expectations.

I have seen performance reviews that are literally 20 pages in length with a tremendous amount of worthless information.  Most in my opinion should not be more than two to three pages that only deal with key objectives and some type of quantitative analysis on success.

I also prefer some type of 360 feedback system in place so that in a non-threatening way immediate supervisors can be told what they need to do to help improve their direct reports performance.  This should be a time where an honest exchange of information takes place so that everyone knows what they need to do to improve day to day performance and lay out a clear plan for professional development for all involved.

We really need to change the culture of the performance review process from going to the dentist mentality to meeting with my coach who I know has my best interest in mind and is passionately committed to helping me reach my potential.

 

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