Shut Up And Listen

Posted by on June 19, 2009

This phrase is not only the title for one of the chapters in Mark DeMoss’s book on Wisdom but it is also incredibly good advice.  To make his point he uses the confirmation hearings of Justice Samuel Alito where most senators spent almost all of their allotted thirty minutes for asking questions pontificating about their own political bias.  At the end of the day we learned very little about the new prospective judge because he had no time to talk.

Mark has many great insights in this book and on this subject he writes, “It’s safe to say that in my life I have never learned a single thing while I was talking.”  On the other hand his willingness to close his mouth and open his ears has given him a tremendous amount of knowledge from a variety of different people.

In corporate culture today the priority is on participative leadership that makes sure everyone on the team has a voice in the conversation.  For that to happen the people that used to do all of the talking have to discipline themselves to now do most of the listening.  Mark has another great quote when he says, “To dominate a meeting or conversation is not power, informed good judgment is power.”

When someone is a great listener it says several things about them.  First they are learners by nature and they seek out other people who can teach them something.  Second they are also humble because they do not always have to be the expert on everything and they are willing to be quiet and even give someone else the credit.  Finally they are relational because they want the other person to know that what they have to say and who they are as a person is important to them.

Mark believes that when a person is not a good listener, “it’s like standing on a balcony over breathtaking panorama and using the entire time to stare into a mirror.”  OUCH!!

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Customer Service That Works

Posted by on June 18, 2009

In a day when we tend to have more user identifications and passwords than we do meaningful relationships real customer service that treats you like a person really stands out and separates you from your competition. There may be nothing worse than to be stuck on a computer phone tree that puts you through twenty selections only to drop your call before you get to a real person.

I love technology but when you substitute the personal touch with a phone tree you have gone too far regardless of what the cost benefit studies tell you. These are my non-negotiable items when it comes to customer service:

1. Personal Touch—If you must use automated answering software there must be an option to get to a real person within first ten seconds of call. If people want to use technology they can go to your website and totally automate the entire transaction but when they make a phone call they need to talk with a highly trained friendly individual who knows how to deliver.

2. Inside Staff—When you talk with someone and you can tell they are probably several thousand miles away and they are not well trained it is a horrible experience. I do not think customer service should be outsourced because no matter how much they know about your product they are still not personally invested in your success.

3. Follow Up—There is nothing better than when the person on the other end of the line lets you know they own your problem and they will not be satisfied until you are as well. This means they give you their name, an incident report number and a direct phone number if you need to call them back. They also get your number and call you back later to make sure the problem has been resolved.

There are many areas where it may be prudent and profitable to cut back on expenses to help your bottom line. This is not one of them because in the end if your customers are not satisfied they will find someone else who gets it.

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Resolving Conflict

Posted by on June 17, 2009

All of us at some point in time will have conflict and disagreements with someone else either in our personal lives or professionally at work.  These situations can be painful at times but seeking resolution is the only way to maintain positive momentum in your life.

There are at least three critical steps that you must take if you want to restore the relationship and move forward in your own life.

1.       Own Your Part—In every disagreement there are always two sides to the story.  I have never known a situation where there was not some responsibility for the problem with both parties.  If we think the other party is the major offender then we tend to wait for them to make the first move.  Instead we need to take whatever percentage of the problem is ours even if it’s minor and do what we need to do to admit it and ask for forgiveness regardless of what the other person does.

2.      Talk Person Privately—Most of the time when we are having problems with another person we tend to go to other people first and complain or try to find emotional support.  What we should do is go privately to the person who offended us first and tell them in a respectful way why we are offended and give them a chance to respond.  When we are talking about someone else to another person rather than talking to them the situation will only get worse.

3.      Give Benefit Of Doubt—When we sense that a conversation is not going well and we can tell it may hurt us we have a decision to make.  We can either assume the worst about the other person’s motives or we can believe the best.  Many times if we can give them the benefit of the doubt at this critical moment then even though it may still hurt there will be no lasting damage because we give them a pass because we trust their heart.

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Promises We Make

Posted by on June 16, 2009

This is the forth in a series of ten posts on promises we should be willing to make to the people that matter the most in our lives.  A promise goes beyond a mere commitment to do something it carries the clear expectation that we are going to pay the price to do what we said we would do.

The first promise was I will sincerely listen to what you have to say.  Really listening to someone without a personal agenda communicates to them that they have value in your life and that you sincerely care.

The second promise was I will always tell you the truth.  Without this there can be no basis of trust, just ask Elizabeth Edwards how painful that can be.

The third promise is I will apologize when I am wrong.  When someone sincerely and genuinely apologizes we know two things.  They are willing to humble themselves and they want to restore their relationship with us because we still matter to them.

The forth promise is I will forgive you when you hurt me.  There can be no lasting peace in any relationship without the power of forgiveness.  This is even more critical when someone has come to us and sincerely apologized they are asking without saying it will you please forgive me?

Forgiveness does not mean that we have the ability to forget what has happened to us but it does mean that we no longer hold that offense against the other person.  This will allow us to learn from the past and not force us to continue to live in it will all its negative memories.

The key thing about giving someone else forgiveness is that you must first have received it yourself.  You may only see your percentage of the responsibility at twenty percent but you must assume responsibility to seek forgiveness for your part before you can move on and release the other person.

This is a promise worth making to the people you care about the most in your life.

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The Power Of Momentum

Posted by on June 15, 2009

There are very few things more difficult to deal with in your personal or professional life than a loss of momentum.  It can be brought on by some major tragedy or a series of small compromises over a very long period of time.

Eventually we get to a place where we start worrying about things outside our control and that drains us of what little emotional energy we have left.  Also because we are so focused on the negative we stop doing the things we should and can do and that brings even more despair.

The only way to break this cycle is to start doing what you can do and build some small daily wins into your life.  This principle works with individuals as well as organizations.

With every small win comes movement and that generates confidence that things are finally headed in the right direction.  When we regain our confidence then we attempt even more things that product even bigger wins and the power of the momentum begins to put the wind back in our sails.

It is very ironic that when we get to the places of greatest difficulty in our lives it is the very smallest of things that can break the downward cycle.  We are desperately searching for the big answer that is going to solve all our problems when the solution was right in front of us all the time.

The good news is that the power of momentum works in a positive way to an even greater degree than it does toward the negative.  When you repeatedly do what you can do daily the positive flow of your life moves you beyond all the negative issues that may still be there but now they are in the proper perspective.

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Clock Building Not Time Telling

Posted by on June 12, 2009

The days of all decisions being made solely at the top with a few people involved are fading fast.  Throughout the Industrial Age of leadership during the last half of 20th century this was the only model of leadership.  The overwhelming percentage of the workforce was for the most part simply telling time based on the clear instructions that were given for them to follow.

Today we are leading from an Information and Idea Age model of leadership.  The entire development process has been delegated to various teams so that everyone who can contribute will be involved.  In essence people are now being asked to help build the clock.

Most people think the changing role of the top executives is by far the most dramatic shift that has occurred.  In a sense of scope that may be true.  Key leaders today do not have to know all the answers to all the questions they only need to know what are the right questions to ask? 

There primary responsibility today is to make sure they have the best possible people on their team because the quality and success of the clocks they are making will determine the future success of the entire organization.

The most dramatic shift in leadership today certainly from a standpoint of scale is not at the top but in the middle of organizations.  There is a big difference in telling time compared to building clocks.  Today people are daily being asked what do you think and what would you recommend?

Many organizations are caught in the middle of this transition and seem to be stuck.  The problem could be that you are asking people who only know how to tell time to build clocks and they are not capable of making that change.  Don’t give up on clock building just find the right people who know how to build great clocks and you will be fine.

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More Than Profits

Posted by on June 11, 2009

Everyone understands how important it is to make a profit if you want your organization to stay in business for the long run.  Incurring debt may be a short term solution but will only buy you some time and may even push your expenses beyond your revenue’s ability to keep up.

What is beginning to happen in corporate America because it is happening in our culture is that many people are moving beyond making a profit to making a difference.  The ultimate bottom line has got to go beyond hitting the numbers to helping other people.

This is particularly important to the next generation workforce that is currently in their twenties and early thirties.  They are connected to everything that is happening in the world and they want to make a difference. 

To this generation it matters how companies treat their employees and if they are willing to allow people a voice in what is determined to be important and what is not.  It also matters that the money that would have gone to the annual company picnic be donated this year to a organization that is feeding the hungry or providing clean water to people who have none.

Today motivating people to accomplish outstanding performance means that maybe one percent of our profits are given to others in need and we show we have a corporate conscious by telling everyone about it.  This goes way beyond just being politically correct to actually caring more about people than profits.

 

 

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Law Of Harvest

Posted by on June 10, 2009

There are many biblical principles taught in scripture and this may be the most important one.  It is foundational to understanding how the Christian life works on a very practical daily level.

The simplest way of stating this principle is that you will eventually reap what you sow .  If you consistently fill your mind with the truth then you should reap all of the benefits of many good decisions.

On the other hand, if you fill your mind with other things then the result will be believing the wrong thing.  Many times we act with even more passion when we believe a lie because the resulting behavior produces pain and rejection.  At this point we really do not want to admit we were wrong.

Another important part of this principle is that we will also reap to the degree we sow.  If we spend little time in God’s word then the result will be a double minded life that is constantly being tossed about with no clear direction.

The next major piece of this principle is that we have a responsibility for the maintenance of the soil where the seed will fall.  If our minds are cluttered with many other things then the truth cannot be heard because all the other noise will drown it out.

Finally, I must go back and deal with that very important word eventually.  Sometimes people are making bad decisions and yet see no immediate negative consequences.  In sharp contrast many people are doing the right thing and have not seen the benefits of walking by faith in the truth.

God in His perfect timing will bring in the harvest.  We all will reap what we have sown.  No suffering for the present time is joyful but it will yield the peaceful fruit of a surrendered life.

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Big Hairy Audacious Goals

Posted by on June 9, 2009

There has always been a delicate balance in goal setting between what can be done and what could be done.  Goals should be realistic and achievable but they also must be courageous and challenging.  Safe is not good enough anymore and we must be willing to take risks that stretch us outside our comfort zone to achieve greatness.

I absolutely love this quote that is extremely timely in our current environment, “Far better to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much no suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory, nor defeat.”  Theodore Roosevelt, 1899

When President Kennedy said in the early 60’s we are going to land a man on the moon and return him safely by the end of this decade the overwhelmingly majority of people thought he had lost his mind, and yet we did it.

The world has changed dramatically in the last decade.  The power of technology and the globalization of all the world economies are driving change in unprecedented ways that no one could have imagined either just a few years ago.  When this recession is over we are never going back to the ways things used to be.

What goals are you setting for yourself and your organization that are commensurate for the challenges that lie ahead in the 21st century?  They must be big hairy and audacious if they are going to lead to outstanding performance.

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How To Create A Legacy

Posted by on June 8, 2009

 

I have attended a lot of funerals over the years and the one common denominator is in every service someone is trying to communicate the legacy of the person who has died.  There are some patterns I have noticed when people have lived their lives in such a way that truly leaves a mark on the world. 

Begin With End In Mind-All of the people that really made a difference took the long look about life and determined what they wanted the top priorities to be in their lives when it was over.  When a person values friendships then you can see a pattern from there earliest years all throughout their lives where other people came first.  If you want to be known for something later then you need to live it now. 

Leave Something Better Than Found It- This is the type of person that is always trying to help others be successful and is not consumed about themselves.  If they are a leader in the corporate world they are not looking out for number one they want the department or the corporation to be better when they leave than when they came.  The true test of someone’s leadership is not when he or she is there but what happens when they are gone. 

Gave Away More Than They Took–  In the end people are either more consumers or contributors.  They see other people as a means to their end or they see other people as the target of their generous spirit.  These are the people that are always adding value to whatever they do from community involvement, relationships, work and faith.  They simply love to give more than they take and people are moved by their humility and servant heart. 

It is never to late to work on your legacy.  The really important thing is taking the time to decide what you want it to be and then when the time comes other people will gladly step up and write your eulogy for you.

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